Girl Time

When I was pregnant with Lucas (aka Juan), one of the things I fretted over the most (I fretted over a lot at that time - maybe it was the hormones?) was how having a second child was going to affect my relationship with my sweet Elise. Would she feel like I was abandoning her? Would it seem like I cared about the baby more than her because babies need more help and attention? Would we ever again have those special one-on-one moments that I treasured so much?

Maybe because of this concern, since Lucas was born I have tried to make an effort to have special one-on-one time with each of my children when I can. Of course times when we all do things together as a family is wonderful and time with me and just the kids is great too, but there is something particularly special about the dynamic of spending a few hours with one child giving them 100% of your love and attention.

At our house, we have a very clear and well defined schedule. Monday is school day, Tuesday is Oma and Opa day, Thursday and Friday are school days and Saturday and Sunday are Mommy and Daddy days. Wednesdays are the only day of the week that Lucas and Elise do something different - Lucas goes to Marty's parents house for the day, while Elise goes to school. Marty goes to pick Luke up after work and I go to pick up Elise. Marty and Lucas come home after having dinner with Gram and Grandpa which means they don't get home until bedtime, so Elise and I spend those several hours between pick up from school and bedtime alone together every week. Sometime last year, we began dubbing it "Girl's Night", an endearing term we have come to love and shout out with excitement (It's Girls Night!!) While I don't like that I barely get to see Lucas on Wednesdays, every week I do look forward to spending quality time with my little girl. And she looks forward to it too.

We usually decide in the car on the way home from school what fun and exciting thing "the girls" are going to do that evening: go out to dinner at a restaurant, go to the library, have a picnic outside, play tons of board games - the possibilities are endless. No matter what we decide, we always have lots of fun and truly enjoy each others company. We chat, we giggle, we dance, we play with games with tiny/rip-able pieces that Lucas would destroy if he were there. I put chores, conversations, work, email - everything aside and devote those three hours completely to focus my attention on Elise and our Girls Night.

A few weeks ago we also got to have a Girls Day, when we went to Sesame Place alone together. We had all been a few weeks before, but I decided to take Elise back so that we could go on some of the older kids rides. We had such a great time all day long, and I think part of what she liked the most about it was not the rides and the shows, but all that special time we spent having fun together.

I realize that spending one-on-one time with her mother will not be the most exciting thing for Elise all too soon and time goes by so quickly that I am trying to savor every minute of it. Like clockwork, I perk up and get a rush of excitement around 4pm every Wednesday and I think "It's Girls Night! I wonder what we'll do?" I hope she feels that way too.