Super Mom

Finding balance in life can be so incredibly hard. Sometimes I feel like there are never enough hours in the day to: devote all the time and attention I want to to my two children; be the best employee I can be and get all my work done efficiently and perfectly; keep a tidy, organized house; feed everyone home-cooked, healthy, balanced meals every night; spend quality time with my husband; find time for myself; keep in touch with everyone I care about and be a great friend/daughter/sister/etc; keep weeds out of my garden; and on and on. It's hard not to feel like you are not giving something or someone enough of your time. Life is a balancing act. But when one of those things you are balancing is time with your children, it feels so much harder when you can't meet your own expectation.

When the school director sent something out last week inviting parents to attend the last swim class for Pre-K this summer, I immediately began trying to figure out if if there way any way I could go, but the Y is more than 45 minutes from my work and the swim class was at 10:30 - neither of which is convenient for a work day. It was not something I could possibly squeeze in to my always hectic schedule, so I didn't say anything to Elise when I dropped her off at school that morning. I resigned myself to the fact that I could not go. But while I was sitting there at my desk I looked and the clock at 10:00am and felt sad. I thought about how proud Elise is of herself with how far she's come with swimming and her fear of putting her face in the water. How much she loves swim class, how much she raves about it. I really, really wanted to witness that and be a part of it. So at the very last minute, right then and there, I dropped everything and raced to the YMCA.

I arrived after they had already started, and immediately saw Elise in the pool looking longingly at another parent that had walked in just a few second before I did. But then she saw me and her eyes lit up and she said "Mommy!" in this state of elation/shock and began absolutely beaming as though my walking in that door was the most thrilling thing that has ever happened in her life. I was a rock star. I stood there in the galley above the pool watching her boil over with pride as she swam and jumped and put her head in the water. She had her eyes on me almost the entire time, making sure I was seeing all of her tricks and progress. She was so happy I was there.

I have done many, many things to make sure that I provide my daughter with the most love and support and comfort she can possibly have, and that she doesn't want for anything, but in those 30 minutes just passively standing there watching her swim lesson, I have never felt like I've done a better job being a parent.

By the time I got back to work I was still smiling. And no one cared I'd been gone.