A Tiny Terror?

Marty and I are not the kind of parents who deny that our children ever do anything wrong or think our kids are absolutely perfect. Of course they are not perfect, they are human. Elise can be pretty whiny sometimes. Lucas went through a bit of an obnoxious hitting phase there for a while. They are kids - they act like kids! But, as a whole, we definitely think that our children are sweet, caring, polite, charming and adorable. I have never been particularly sensitive to criticisms about my children because they are children and they do act nutty sometimes - that's what parenting is all about.

But last week, when the daycare sent home the quarterly descriptive report saying the following:

"Our sweetheart has turned into our tiny terror."

I admit, I was a little shocked. Our sweet baby Lucas? A terror? That's pretty upsetting. Not particularly because I deny that it is true, but maybe more because it is true! Terror may be a little harsh, but our laid back, sweet little boy has turned into a tantruming, impatient ball of emotions. He is a terror compared to his chill-baby former self. What happened?

Don't get me wrong. Lucas is still very loving and sweet, and he can be laid back about some things. Like falling for example - he is constantly falling and hurting himself and rarely ever makes a peep about it. While Elise has more of a tendency to cry for 20 minutes over a tiny scratch, Lucas won't even shed one tear over a bloody forehead scrape that hangs around for more than two weeks. Where Lucas is not laid back now is his recent need for instant gratification. He wants things NOW. We're not quite sure what is going on with our little guy, but we are actively working on teaching him patience. Though I am not sure that patience is something that can be taught (we're trying!).

If you ask him if he'd like to go outside, he'll run to the door happy as can be cheering "Outside!" But when you say, ok let's get your shoes on, he throws himself onto the floor in a heap of screaming tantrum. The idea of delaying his trip outside by 30 seconds to slip some shoes on is too much to bear. Or if Elise is playing with something that he suddenly realizes he wants to play with, he'll try to take it from her. After gentle reminders about waiting for a turn, Lucas crumples into a complete and total meltdown. Or he'll ask for a cookie and I'll say no, and he'll run over to the carpet (because from all these tantrums he's coming to realize that the hardwood is not comfortable for thrashing around) throw himself to the floor in bitter tears.

Luckily these tantrums are usually fairly short lived. He has a short attention-span and tends to forget what he's so upset about in a matter of minutes (unlike Elise who never forgets anything. Ever.) He is easily redirected and can go from on-the-floor screaming to politely asking "me turn please?" with an adorable, charming grin in a matter of seconds. But for whatever reason his instant reaction lately is to completely freak out if he doesn't get what he wants the second he wants it.

We are working hard to teach him that waiting is ok and that having a fit is a sure-fire way NOT to get what you want, but I have a feeling that it's going to be a long road. We're taking it one day at a time. But luckily, Lucas still has an overflow of charm and sweetness to remind you that while he is impatient, he is still a wonderful kid.